Dark Night of the Collective Soul

I don’t know how you have been recently, particularly this year 2017, but if you are anything like me, you might have been weighed down, disillusioned, even broken at times, and tired of ‘it all.’

Yes, I can honestly hold my hand up and admit that it has been tough. I may have something of a reputation as one who inspires others, who always seems to keep going and one who waves the flag of hope. But boy have I been digging the dirt. I have been almost depressed and reluctant to participate in the whole game any more. When I have looked around at what is going on I just thought ‘fuck it, it is such a mess I may as well leave.’

But I stay, sometimes hanging on by finger tips, and then sometimes feeling new birth and wisdom arising.

Of course we are in weird times. The fact that the ‘greatest nation on earth’ could vote to the top a narcissist right wing misogynist is bewildering to anyone who has any degree of humanity. It has hit us all hard, and we don’t really have an answer, as yet, to the new intensity on Planet Earth.

But it is provoking some new conversations, new inquiry, new depth and new commitment. It is asking us all very personal questions about what our spirituality really means, about when and where we take action, about who we really are, and what we tolerate.

And so it is digging in to our own psyches. And that means it isn’t easy. Things are changing on Planet Earth and the growth is very painful. 

In fact it seems as though we are hell bent on destruction.

And if that is so how do we, individually and collectively, deal with it?

The ground is unstable, the weather is freaky, there is a madman driving the bus and we all have our seat belts on hoping he wont career off the road.

We are in the dark night of the collective soul, and there is no saying whether we will live or die. But we must, each one of us who is called, face the darkness, face the horror consciously, like true spiritual warriors. Not turn away but meet each shadow as it arises, head on and eyeball to eyeball, as it disappears like the maras Buddha faced. We must dispel all illusions until only reality and truth are left.

Thats why its all here, thats why it is so intense. And of course thats why we all want to do something. But the greatest something we can do is dissolve our own illusions and truly awaken beyond all this. There is a greater version of human around the corner, a light filled, ecstatic, liberated, expanded upgrade coming online. 

But you have to start actively CHOOSING THIS, not waiting for it to come and meanwhile staying in the fear realm.

The fear realm is the prison and it is a trap. Fear feeds on itself and we all stay small and we all perish. Be bold, be wise, be free. Dissolve all your illusions until only truth and love remain, and live your life from that place.

And one day humanity will take the step upwards towards its light body self.

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Free Your Mind And Your Life Will Follow

It doesn’t matter how you do it. It could be through silent meditation, through cathartic releasing of body armouring, it could be through a near death experience or just grace. It could be through psychedelics or plant medicine. It could be through spending time outside the system, finding a wild shamanic group that offers a path to ‘the old ways,’ through story telling and ceremonies.

It doesn’t matter how it happens but it does matter that it happens.

What is it?

Freeing your mind.

I can honestly count the number of people I have met on my travels who appear to have achieved this great accolade, on the fingers of one hand. I’m not even sure, much of the time, whether I am one of them. But I see the goal, I can see how it looks and I make it my every day intention.

To me it is the only thing that matters.

The whole purpose of incarnating is to find out who, or what, is incarnating.
The entire purpose of this exercise called ‘life’ is to see if it is possible to retain, or discover, the pristine seeing of conscious awareness while in a body/mind system that is a ‘perceiving machine.’
Perception and belief is so convincing that it would have us believe it is all there is. The deception is incredibly convincing, so much so that it has the majority of people in its grasp.

I know to most people its not important. But to me a world lived from this kind of freedom is beautiful and remarkable, in many ways.
It somehow seems to ‘re-engineeer‘ us and we become as new beings. It creates a wholeness, a depth, a natural wisdom and an inconceivable ability to see inside both the individual human and the society at large. It makes us more intelligent, intuitive, compassionate, caring and authentic. We act from this integrity and it has a profound impact on our life and the lives of everyone we touch.

Or, as Morpheus says in The Matrix, You take the blue pill – the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe.’

Free your mind and your life will follow a new path.

Thanks for reading!

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Reclaiming Warrior Consciousness

The self-confidence of the warrior is not the self-confidence of the average man. The average man seeks certainty in the eyes of the onlooker and calls that self-confidence. The warrior seeks impeccability in his own eyes and calls that humbleness. The average man is hooked to his fellow men, while the warrior is hooked only to infinity.” ~ Carlos Castaneda
b9f5fc244420ef20533670eb93ce77d6

It appeared to have died many years ago. In fact not many ever think about it and thus it is relegated to myths of ancient times, or turned into super hero comics and movies.

What is it?

Warrior consciousness.

It died when we humans got smaller and more submissive. It died when we became so socialised and urbanised that we lost our wildness. There was a trade off in order to live peacefully and collectively, and it was the very thing that gave us freedom and adventure and power. It was the very thing that made us warriors with integrity and honour.

And it was the very thing that enabled us to stand up to tyrants and maniacs.

And when we humans lose integrity, honour, impeccability and wisdom, we lose everything that lifts us up from the swamp of the ego. Without the gifts of the warrior we live like guttersnipes grabbing power and trying desperately to dominate each other. Without honour and authenticity we live in a kind of half light of ego mania where we each try and feed off each other. A living hell realm.

Warrior consciousness is what lifts us towards the divine and out of the gutter.
And the loss of our warrior like discipline and discernment has led to a submissiveness that has consequently allowed petty tyrants and despots to rule us and dominate us.

And we need to reclaim our warrior consciousness. Now.

How?

I have spent time with a shaman I knew during the 90s. To some extent he trained me. He ran a tribe doing ceremonies, sweat lodges, authentic being, talking circles, offerings, poetry of the heart, musical wildness and feasting – he still does I think. I went through a deep transformational 2 years with him, seeking power in dark places, caves, mountain tops and in sweat lodges and fire ceremonies. I got injured, torn open, humbled, at times humiliated, adored and applauded for my bravery and authenticity.
dsc02299It was a devastatingly heart opening, defence shattering experience that allowed me to see and experience what Castenada is talking about in the quote at the start of this blog.
At first I was just the same old guy doing lots of weird ceremonies, but after two years I had developed eloquence, respect, authenticity, even some impeccability and honour. I thought and felt poetically and a passion arose in my very being, a passion for truth and love, a warrior like passion that has never turned off.

And then I discovered a love I had never had before, with my wife Amoda Maa. This love burned up all vestiges of arrogance or hiding and resolved everything that stood in the way of intimacy and authentic relating.

And then I discovered self inquiry, the form of spiritual investigation to seek what is true above and beyond all relative beliefs and thoughts. This inquiry allowed me to begin to rest in absolute consciousness and allow the drama of life to play on without me.

So the answer, to me, when asked how to develop this warrior-like truth and impeccability, is:
a. Willingness to be stripped of what is false within you.
b. A desire for truth that burns in your heart.
c. An acknowledgement that things are not working as they are.

If those three things align then you are ready. You need to find someone, somewhere, a group, tribe, workshop, book, teacher, shaman, who you are drawn to, one that makes you feel excited and scared, and you need to dive in head first and get carried by the wave. Don’t get into hero worship and always remember what you are there for.

You are there to learn about yourself. You are seeking your warrior nature, your truth, impeccability and authenticity. It doesn’t have to take lifetimes, and it doesn’t have to be this mystery that many elevated spiritual teachers talk of. Don’t get fooled by too much of this ‘enlightenment’ business.

Keep it simple. Be committed to stripping away what is false and fake within you, and harmony and truth will arise naturally. Follow the signs, they will be everywhere, and when you learn how to read them they will be even clearer.

And then the journey of your life will get very cool and very interesting. When we are stuck in normal mindset it is very boring, and very linear. We are shut off from the intelligence of nature and life itself. We are, in effect, alone. When you begin to develop as a warrior this barrier begins to dissolve and the world awakens! It was always there but you were asleep to it.

And then you become the warrior Castaneda talks about.

The self-confidence of the warrior is not the self-confidence of the average man. The average man seeks certainty in the eyes of the onlooker and calls that self-confidence. The warrior seeks impeccability in his own eyes and calls that humbleness. The average man is hooked to his fellow men, while the warrior is hooked only to infinity.” ~ Carlos Castaneda

Thanks for reading, good luck out there.
Kavi in Hat copy

 

The Global Body Awakens

Even in the face of all this hate and fear
We must remain open
As we protest and campaign we must stay as love
And not be drawn into the old ways
Of judgement and finger pointing
If there is a change happening
In the very heart and soul of man and woman
If there is something new growing within us
We must stay healthy and well meaning and not become hate

As the body grows new cells
Those cells can be healthy or toxic

To truly fight the disease
A cell must be well adjusted and vibrant
It must be fully alive and full of light

A hate filled cell will only produce more disease
Let our teachers be our own bodies
Our own cells

This is the time of embodiment

In this time of decay and cancer
When the global body is full of disease
You, and I, and our bodies, our minds, our emotions
Matter more than we imagine
Each one of us plays their part
And that part can be
Played with goodness at their core
Or hate in their heart

Only one will lead to transformation.
It is time to choose the path
And commit to either one way or the other.

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Meet the World on Your Own Terms

Eventually you have to meet the world on your own terms.

You have been trained and conditioned to somehow fit in. You have been told what the terms of the game are, been told what you have to be and do in order to belong to this big human family called society. Yeah, you, and me, and everyone else, have been told we have to do this, that or the other, to find our place, our niche, and that’s just the way it is, was, and will be.

The game was rigged from the time of your arrival in this dimension and you bought the whole ticket. We all did.

And how has it worked out?

Some have been successful at it. And it has to be said some folks are very very good at playing the BIG game as I call it.
BUT many are alienated and lost, confused and miserable about it all. Many creatives, artists, outsiders, many sensitives, indigos and introverts, have not fared very well at all. And they shoulder the guilt and self negating thoughts that it is their fault. But here are my observations for those specific people who can’t fit in, don’t want to fit in, but feel somehow wrong for it.

2abd27bef63ed8a9a5c92cab5c31e727You might not be designed to fit in!

Your very alienation, even depression, and your sensitivity etc could be the very signals your own soul is sending you telling you, nudging you, reminding you, that you have to meet this world on your own terms and do your own unique thing…no matter what other people, or society at large, may think, say or do.

Now, before I go any further, I am assuming here that you are a peaceful, creative, loving, compassionate and inherently kind person. I don’t want to encourage hostile, racist, misogynist people who hate others out onto the street.

But you! You have to get out there and meet the world on your own terms.
And as you get older, the incentive to do it, the urgency to do it, the pressure (from the inside) to do it, increases. Of course so does the fear, the anxiety, and the voice inside your head says,’ NO, you have too much to lose, you don’t know what you are doing, these feelings will pass, just stay in the box and shut up.’

But you know what. The impulse to offer your gift to others, the urge, if you have it, to be of greater purpose, the burning desire within you to break out and ‘do your thing,’ whatever that thing is, it DOES NOT GO AWAY.

It might live somewhere inside, in the dark shadows of your psyche, it might make you feel tired and ill, it might even make you depressed, but it will not ever go away. And upon your time to leave this sacred existence, you will ponder it. Sorry about that.

So I implore you, beseech you, invite you, cajole you, and challenge you, be bold, be daring, be true to your inner voice, no matter how crazy. Dare to step up and step out. You owe it to your self and to the world. Don’t be duped and suppressed any longer than is necessary.

You can create the rules of your own life.
You can be the one who decides the rules of your world.
It is up to you.
The world needs you.
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One mind…..7 billion variations

The Problem, as my old Chinese Doctor said, is your MIND
So my beloved has fled to Stockholm to do Satsang for the weekend and I am here in this mess, with a still wracked body and now just pulled a muscle or twitched a nerve in my shoulder.
Not particularly inspired by anything…BUT wait a minute!
Aren’t we making the move of our lives in just two weeks time!=?
(We are going to the US for a while)
Yup.
Why am I not super duper excited?
Because I no longer seem to get super duper excited.

Life offers things, they arrive, they disappear, and it is an endless cycle of appearance and disappearance.

It’s been a heck of a year and has beaten me in many ways…and that beating has actually softened me so much I am like dough that wont shape to bread.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining, far from it. I’m actually somewhat ecstatic in a still kind of way. But not excited.

I became weary of mind.

That’s what actually has happened this year. Weary of the stories, the fears, the games, the excuses, the projections, did I say the fears? The endlessness of mind chatter until we croak.

And I got utterly bored because this year I got to see it in full display, freaking me out, warning about this and that, constantly updating me on the latest threat to me, humanity, anything…We don’t need terrorism when we have our own unscrutinised minds…

And it didn’t help at all..It only brought suffering, body problems and exhaustion.
And I saw that my mind is your mind, is everyone’s mind. Mind is non specific, non personal.

Our personal experiences make it seem unique, but thats an error of perception.
There is only one mind with 7 billion variations. On and on and on it goes, ‘protect and survive, threat and attack…must be careful…danger, danger,
danger…judgement…projection…righteousness….’ yada yada yada chatters the mind..

And I got bored listening, to myself and others. That getting bored and seeing the endlessness of the chatter was the greatest blessing. It meant I stopped listening.
And when I get drawn to listen and take it seriously, I am hauled back into the Matrix world of personal suffering…and ooh! I quickly remember and run out of the prison…

I don’t buy it…I’m done with the mind…Great tool, unfathomable talent and skill, astonishing servant of something greater…But believe all it says at your peril…It will lock you up, throw away the key, and tell you it’s for your own good…And you might believe it..
I feel better already.
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The Butterfly People

It is not something we contemplate often, but maybe it should be. You see, we humans, and animals, and the earth, and wired together in one great tapestry.

That is not just some spiritual verbiage, or airy fairy idea about oneness. It’s a fact. We are interconnected and interlaced and our actions affect an area outside ourselves in ways we understand and, to some extent, beyond our understanding. And our inactions have the same effect.

Do you remember hearing about the butterfly effect? It said something like, if a butterfly flaps its wings on one side of the world, the effect ripples around and changes something on the other side.

Put scientifically:
“In chaos theory, the butterfly effect is the sensitive dependence on initial conditions in which a small change in one state of a deterministic nonlinear system can result in large differences in a later state.” Wikipedia

butterfly effectBut suppose, for one moment, that this also works when something doesn’t happen. What does this mean? What I mean here is that, suppose you are called to some service, to some action, but you hesitate and falter, full of self doubt or anxiety, and you don’t take the action you intuitively know is part of your destiny? If you are called but you do not go, what effect does it have? 

In other words, does ‘inaction,’ have an ‘uneffect?’

Of course the universe will always fill in the gaps we leave. Nature abhors a vacuum and will not let it happen, so the universe will build itself around what we do, or don’t, do.

But are we denying the world the opportunity to benefit from our ‘wing flap?’
Are you the butterfly that could flap its wings and affect something far away, for the better?
And if you might be, who are you to deny and turn away from that, because you feel anxious, or confused, or poor?

I have pondered this, and come to the conclusion there must be millions and millions of people wanting to ‘be of service’ and those millions and millions of people, together, could create such enormous change simply by their small actions, it is extraordinary. It boggles the mind to imagine the potential of millions of people flapping their wings, and not just once, but again and again.

six-degreesIt is not airy fairy. If you imagine the power of one tiny cell, you see potential, but in many ways not much more. But if you imagine the potential and power of that one cell unified and interconnected with millions, billions of other cells, you see a transformation that was inconceivable before. You see creatures, flowers, trees, human beings, animals…everything comes from that unity of one with many. The power is undeniable.

But now to the opposite effect. When we withhold our light, our gifts, our genius, our power, our very potential, from the world, for whatever reason, it has an impact, an effect. It has repercussions.

I think the world cries a little when we deny it our beauty and love.
Maybe it even dies a little.

During my years spent with a shamanic camp and teacher I learned a little about beauty and poetry. I was shown, and taught, that the gods of the invisible world feed on beauty, truth, poetry, chocolate and words of love, and things like this. My shaman teacher encouraged us to speak to the invisible world and offer it our beauty and poetry, offer it our chocolate and incense, expecting nothing in return.

I remember he would actually be angry when someone would hold back their beauty. He wasn’t understanding like we are supposed to be these days. He saw it as an insult to the invisible world, and therefore to life itself. He was angry that people were letting their own egos, their own smallness, or pride, or fear, block this beautiful dance between the world of form and formlessness.

His interpretation was that the invisible world that held all the secrets and the mystery, was what actually held the world together. It doesn’t want your ego, it wants your truth and beauty. If that means you cry and shake when you offer it, it loves that. If it means you stand naked in innocence and offer your soul or your confusion, it will love that. It is the world beyond ego. It’s just not put in modern spiritual terms. But it’s just as real and powerful. 

Service to others, serving something greater than self, is the ultimate beauty and love. You and I know that because when we see it, we cry. Those tears we cry are the world crying itself back to life.

irene-carr-quotes2So I hope you are seeing what I am trying to say here. I am trying to say that if we all become willing to flap our wings, to go beyond ourselves, to offer our beauty, things happen somewhere. It may be invisible to us. It may even be subtle. But it doesn’t matter.
I really believe our complacency, fuelled by our fear and doubt, bolstered by our feelings of powerlessness, will be the cause of our destruction and the destruction of our world, if were are not careful.

That is why it’s so important that we, the small people, who only have small wings, flap them all together, at the same time.

I feel the urgency of this. We are being called, each of us, to grow bigger and bolder, to sacrifice our questions and our fear, our confusion and our doubt. The way will be revealed as we walk the path. But each of us must make the first step consciously and voluntarily. 

Thank you for reading!

 

Why Your Transformation Matters So Much

Why Your Transformation Matters So Much.

We need to reach a place of such authority through our collective consciousness and awakened action that somehow (and I have no idea how) we actually render Politics and politicians redundant and inept.

While our consciousness is still in the grip of the mainstream system, politicians and manipulators, we have no power.

If we fight it, it wins. It’s like fighting your own ego, you can never win.
We feed it by fighting it. it’s an entity that thrives on fear and attention.

We all know that by now.

And yet centuries of habituation and conditioning have convinced us that we can only find freedom and choice within the system, within the prison.
It doesn’t look like that is the truth.

A man who fights for his freedom while he is prison may find some relative freedom of movement and choice, but the freedom is not his and not total. He is still in a prison, albeit a lenient one. This freedom can be denied him at any time.

So how to collapse the prison entirely and live from total freedom?

My feeling is we don’t know, but all we can do is find this place in ourselves, and through that very activity and transformation something new happens and the threads and shoots of a new way, a new paradigm, begin to form ON THEIR OWN, through natural evolutionary movement.
They are already there, and some of us feel them and see them.

We don’t have to sort out every problem of transition from the Age of Self to the Age of Selflessness, we just have to play our part and render ourselves free.

A cell doesn’t know how a body grows and works. It plays its part fully by being who it is and contributing fully of itself in its own unique way.

Thats all we have. Our own lives as they are now, here, our own consciousness, relationships, work, creativity, health, they are the things that will allow the new age to gather momentum.

Thats why, when someone talks to me of feeling powerless, useless and lost, or they say ‘what can I do?’ I say,
It begins with you. You are at the centre of it. You are not some added extra. You are primary to the change and it matters more then you could every imagine.’
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Your Transformation Matters – Urgent Upgrade Time

I haven’t posted on here for some time, but with global events being so intense I felt the need to offer some words of support and inspiration to anyone who may be struggling under the ‘tsunami’ that is rolling toward us day by day.
And it is a tsunami, make no mistake.

We are under pressure, all of us. Those who are trying to consciously understand and meet what seems to be happening, and those who are not. It is the same pressure on both. And it is easy to throw judgment at those who are ‘unconscious’ but that is not the point at all.
We are human. We are a human body made of 7 billion individual selves.
Right now many of those selves are fighting each other like a cancer, or like an auto immune disease. And thats not just a metaphor.
It is the truth, because the world is a microcosm, and the whole is contained in the part.

vivir-bien1The point of emerging awareness is to know that, and act from that place with boundaries, compassion, love and gratitude.
The upgrade, brought to us by the evolutionary impulse, by the movement into the Age of Aquarius, is no small thing. It’s a radical shift in consciousness of the entire species, and possibly the whole of life itself.

It is a shift from the era of the individual to the era of collective consciousness, where the purpose of life is to serve the whole, like the cell in a body.

It is a shift from the era of lies, deceit and manipulation to the era of freedom and truth, transparency and authenticity.

It is the era of technological revolution and breakthrough, including the liberation of electricity from oil based, paid for, to alternative and free.

It is an era of the ‘brotherhood of man,’ where all become equal, all races and between the sexes. Inequality will be considered irrelevant because each will see themselves in each other. 

Of course right now it doesn’t seem like that at all! It seems to be the opposite. But the night is darkest just before dawn.

What can you do?

Keep the faith.
Stay focused on truth, loving kindness and authenticity.
Clear out your inner wardrobes – The more transparent and authentic you are the greater your contribution to the whole.
Become like Neo, make your enlightenment bulletproof.
Take the opportunity to inquire into your own sense of freedom. What is holding you back from being free right now? Is it something real or is it something to do with your past? Other people? Is it something you are ok with, or do you think it’s time to do some house cleaning?
Take the opportunity to look at your own division. Most of us have been trained to separation, and will inevitably view other people as ‘other.’ Most white people are inherently racist, even if its subtly. Or you may see women as inferior. It might be time to look at these tough areas of our lives.

Light-Being-MEDIt is time to dig deep into your inner resources and commit on a whole new level.
And it may take time. This global change is going to get more intense yet, and may become incredibly challenging as the dark stuff spirals out of control. We could see upheavals on substantial levels as institutions really begin to crumble, and that will trigger all our survival issues. What I mean is food, electricity, money, water, safety etc. It could get nasty.
I’m not being alarmist but we need to understand the changes are great. The future could be incredible. It could be incredibly good or could be incredibly bad. There are forces out there that do not want the global population to be free, to have free electricity and for us to share in equal brotherhood. They want us in fear and hate and perpetual war.
It is up to us to become the truth of what we want. 
If you want to see a loving world, BE LOVING NOW. Don’t wait for the world to become loving.
If you want to live in a world of freedom, BE FREE NOW, in whatever way you can. Free is a relative term, but to be free of mind manipulation is essential for each of us. Turn off the TV, stop buying newspapers and become a truth investigator.
Make the move to free energy, in whatever way you can.
Make healthy choices, go organic and eat more plant based.
Eliminate mass produced and chemical laden foods. Avoid those that are man made.
Become your own researcher and investigator.

What I am saying is live it now, don’t wait until the world catches up. It will only catch up when you live it. Thats a strange law but probably some weird quantum entanglement. Try it out. 
I’m always trying it out. I live as freely, compassionately, authentically and lovingly as I can. I’m not perfect and I fail often. But I do it anyway, because once tasted never forgotten. I used to live my life under the shroud of fear and shame, and it was hell. It was like wearing a mask all the time.
I can tell you now there is no mask. That is a huge relief and a great liberation.

So I am actively encouraging you to be braver, more foolish, to risk more, to become unafraid, to live more freely and wildly and to play your glorious part in our evolution to become a free flying butterfly.

Let me know how it goes.

Thanks for reading!

Kavi in Hat copy